Breaking Up: 10 Methods
I. At the table: knife, fork, salt, spoon
Lots of napkins.
II. In the car. Tear a map down the center.
Place one ½ on the driver’s seat.
Forget the keys.
III. The park. Yes. Go there.
Push one empty swing.
IV. Over the phone. Call and hang up.
Do not answer when the return call comes.
V. In bed. Before sleep. Before sex. After sex.
Turn on the overhead fan.
Watch it spin.
VI. The post office. Open the blue metal box.
Drop the letter in. Close the box.
Stand at the box thinking for 5 minutes
or a week.
Bring an umbrella.
VII. Wait for rain.
Let it run down your face.
Listen for thunder.
VIII. Over very hot coffee. With too much sugar.
Speak quickly. Blow the steam.
Burn your tongue anyway.
IX. Write an e-mail. Read it over. Sign it With Love.
Delete With Love. Sign it With Love.
X. Cut off your arm. Offer it up.
Say I’ll never be the same.